TODAY'S NUGGET: Vatel, Master of Pleasure (2000) - An Example of How a Comeback Stinger Works (Dialogue Setup-Payoff)

[Quick Summary: A master steward must ensure a royal visit goes smoothly in order to gain his cash-strapped boss a commission from King Louis XIV.]

Q: I want to write a comeback stinger, so focus on the punch line, right?
A: It's important, but not the MOST important part.

Q: Huh?! What's more important than the punch line?
A: A punch line is the payoff. Without a proper set up, it languishes.

Q: Give me an example of a good set up.
A: Let's use today's script, which is a farce that exposes the excesses and debauchery of 1600s France. Everyone obsesses about status...except our protagonist Vatel.

In the scene below, the antagonist (de Lauzun) gets the final zinger, but note that it works because it was set up properly:
- Vatel is a steward who rose up the ranks by his own merit.
- The Marquis de Lauzun is the king's courtier, i.e., an intermediary.
- Vatel and the Marquis have the same level of authority, on opposite sides. 
- The Duchesse de Longueville is after a political promotion for her husband, and is not afraid to seduce the Marquis to get it. 
- The set up is about who can top the other in status:
--> First, de Lauzun tries to belittle Vatel. 
--> Then, Vatel uses his wits against de Lauzun. It's a draw.
--> Then, the Duchesse butts in and says she's the first to have de Lauzun's secret. It looks like she's on top. 
--> Finally, de Lauzun saying she's the last to know. He outsmarted her with the last word.

EXT. CASCADES. LATER. 

,,,Lazun notices Vatel and laughs.

LAUZUN (CONTINUED): I was just telling the Duchesse about your boyhood days in the brothels of the Ile Saint Louis.

VATEL (bows to the Duchesse): It's quite true. No one know more about the brothels of the Ils Saint Louis than the Marquis de Lauzun.

DUCHESSE (to Lauzun): I think he's just insulted you but it's hard to tell. That's a rare gift; if you punish him for it I'll tell everyone your favorite perversion.

LAUZUN (smiling to the Duchesse): But, Duchesse, you were the last to know. 

WHAT I'VE LEARNED: The cleverness of this stinger lies in its set up.  

Here, the Marquis de Lauzun fails to ridicule Vatel with his own shortcomings.  Frustrated, he uses the Duchesse's love of gossip against her with added spite.

Vatel, Master of Pleasure (2000)(1/19/99 revised)
by Jeanne Labrune
Translated and adapted by Tom Stoppard

TODAY'S NUGGET: Twins (1988) - The Purpose of the Energy Flow is to Show Character

[Quick Summary: A tall, "perfect" man goes in search of his twin, who turns out to be a short, small time crook.]

I guess I shouldn't have been surprised that this draft was very well polished. 

First, it was rewritten by last week's Harris & Weingrod, and second, the great William Goldman gave it a pass too.

I really liked that:
- the purpose of the energy flow in this script is to show character, and 
- there's a control to the chaos.

For example, in the scene below: 
- This is the scene that introduces the idea these are twins by using "twinning" behaviors.
- Julius is the taller, "good" twin.
- Vince is the shorter, "bad" twin.
- Notice the largest paragraph below is all one sentence, a controlled roller coaster of a ride, much like sheltered Julius' experience of encountering a big city.
 - Then note how the energy flow and momentum ramps up and lands on the moment Julius stands in the middle of the street, absorbing all of Hollywood.
- The writers are deliberately controlling the chaos with pacing and flow. 

EXT. GRAUMAN'S CHINESE THEATER - MAGIC HOUR

Vince brushes himself off, hesitates a moment, pulling on his left ear with his right hand.

Immediately behind him, facing the opposite direction, is another man, also pulling on his left ear with his right hand. It is Julius --

-- Their backs are to each other. Without ever catching sight of one another, they move off, going their separate ways. Now, from this -- 

                                                    CUT TO: 

EXT. DOWNTOWN HOLLYWOOD STREET - NIGHT

Downtown Hollywood in all it's sleeze. There's a museum and a scientology center and every fast food place imaginable and people shouting as they sell things, "flowers" and street food and there's a porno house showing Tight 'n Tender and there's young people dressed like punks and old people boozed out and pimps and druggies and guys slumped unconscious int he gutter and crowds of tourists walking this way, that way, and there's noise and little and one more thing --

--There's Julius, case in hand, staring around, taking it all in. We're a long way from his island now. He studies all the humanity swirling around him --

                                                   CUT TO:

CLOSEUP ON JULIUS

And you can see it on his face: He loves it.

JULIUS (almost a whisper): ...How wonderful...  

WHAT I'VE LEARNED: I liked this script because it used cinematic language well.  It uses words to convey how we should feel about images, but was readable.  

I like to find Goldman scripts that are new-to-me, like this one. They are instructive since they are: a) easy to read and b) have great craftsmanship.

Twins (1988)(consolidated 4th draft, 4/27/88 with revisions)
by William Osborne & William Davies
Revisions by Timothy Harris & Hershel Weingrod and William Goldman

TODAY'S NUGGET: Trading Places (1983) - Not Tipping Your Hand Right Before a Turning Point (Suspense)

[Quick Summary: A homeless man and a broker have their lives surreptitiously swapped, all for a measly bet between two rich old men.]

This buddy comedy is a gem because of its classic fish-out-of-water setup, i.e., poor guy swaps lives with rich guy. 

It also does a great job of playing the moments as real, particularly leading up to the turning points.  This leads to REAL consequences & REAL stakes.

Because there are no magic solutions and no "fake deaths", it doesn't tip the hand of what's to come next and helps keep the suspense rising.

For example, in the scene below: 
- Louis Whipple is the grandson-in-law-to-be for two elderly Mr. Dukes. 
- Louis has just tried to O.D. on prescription pills. 
- Billy Ray is the homeless man.
- Ophelia is a woman of the streets who joins the adventure.
- Billy Ray and Ophelia have been walking Louis around the park to keep him awake.
- The writers allow Louis to make mistakes and allow the situation to defeat him.  They don't try to soften the blow by a magical solution.
- As a result, we go right up to the turning point (Louis' aha! moment below ) with real stakes (the stupid bet has gone awry and is about to cause a fatality). 

EXT. A PARK - NIGHT

...The two of them fall in the snow, and Billy Ray ends up sitting on Whipple's chest, holding him down.

BILLY RAY: Try and get it through your thick skull, Whipple! This whole thing was an experiment! And you and me are the guinea pigs! They made a bet over what would happen to us!

The truth is finally starting to dawn on Whipple. He looks from Ophelia's face to Billy Ray's.

LOUIS: A bet? They ruined my life over a bet? A bet for how much?

BILLY RAY: One dollar.

Whipple finally gets it. He smiles and nods, but his left eye is twitching.

LOUIS: A dollar. Good. Okay. Fine.

BILLY RAY: You okay, man?

LOUIS: Oh, I feel wonderful. And I'm going to feel even better.

                                       CUT TO: 

WHAT I'VE LEARNED: One reason that I think audiences have become uninterested in "fake death" universes is because there are no consequences, no stakes, and thus little suspense.

Trading Places (1983)(June, 1982, 1st draft)
by Timothy Harris & Herschel Weingrod

TODAY'S NUGGET: Married to the Mob (1988) - How to Not Lose the Reader, Despite Various POV

[Quick Summary: After her mobster husband is murdered by his boss, Angela is determined to make a new life with her son, but the mob won't leave her alone.]

Q: What sets this script apart for you?  
A: It captures different points of view, but never loses focus on the protagonist.

Q: How does it do it?  Especially maintaining such clarity? 
A: I think it's the unity of the subject matter.  There's a variety of points of view, but they're all about the same subject, i.e., Angela.

For example, in the scene below:
- Angela is a sweet woman, who was oblivious to the shenanigans of Sal, her dead mobster husband.  Everyone makes assumptions about her. 
- Tony, Sal's best friend, is the head mobster. 
- Tony is married to Connie and is afraid of her.
- Tony killed Sal because Sal was sleeping with Tony's side girlfriend.
- Tony wants to sleep with Angela, and keeps tabs on her, even after she's moved away.
- Tony and his underling Tommy show up at Angela's new apartment.
- Note the multiple points of view (Connie, Ed, Mike, Tommy, Tony). Each segment adds important information, AND they're united by the subject matter, Angela.
- Also note how: a)  the unity of subject matter, plus b) CAPITALIZED location slugs helps the reader easily switch points of view. This is great clarity of writing.

EXT. RIVINGTON STREET - AT THAT MOMENT

IN FRONT OF ANGELA'S BUILDING

Angela, Tony and Tommy come out of the building and pause on the steps. 

TOMMY: Look, Ange, Rose wants to have you out for dinner next week. How's Thursday?

ANGELA: I really don't think...

TOMMY: Or Friday?

ANGELA: Umm...

TOMMY: Or any night that's good for you.

ANGELA: I tell you, Tommy...I'm so busy with the move, getting set up and everything. I don't even know if we're gonna stay here. Why don't I give you a call when I get settled?

TOMMY (disappointed): Sure, I understand. But don't forget, okay? Promise?

ANGELA (squirming): Sure, Tommy.

TOMMY: Take care, Angie. If you need anything...

ANGELA: Thanks, Tommy. So long.

He gives her a big hug and heads for the car.

DOWN THE BLOCK

peering over the steering wheel of the white Cadillac is Tony's worst nightmare -- Connie. She watches with keen interest.

IN FRONT OF ANGELA'S BUILDING

TONY: It was great seeing you, Angela.

Tony takes Angela's hand. She stiffens. He plants a gentle kiss on her hand while looking into her eyes.

IN THE WHITE CADILLAC

Connie watches as Tony kisses Angela's hand. Connie's worst suspicions are confirmed. She's absolutely livid.

FROM A BASEMENT STAIRWELL

Ed video-tapes Tony and Angela. Connie's white Cadillac zooms past.

IN FRONT OF ANGELA'S BUILDING

Tony gives Angela a meaningful look.

TONY (in Italian): Ci vediamo, cara.

Tony gets into the car and Tommy drives off. Angela is emotionally exhausted.

ANGELA (moans): Oh, God.

AT THE FIFTH FLOOR WINDOW

Mike has seen Tony's farewell. Mike shakes his head ruefully as he watches Angela walk down the street. He moves away from the window.

AT THE CORNER

Angela stops in front of the "Hello, Gorgeous!" beauty salon. IN the window there's a mirror with an inscription reading: ARE YOU READY FOR A BRAND NEW YOU? Angela looks at her reflection in the mirror. She can see that the events of the day have caught up to her. She tugs at her Chez Ray hairdo, obviously displeased. Then Angela notices a sign in the window that reads: "Help Wanted." 

WHAT I'VE LEARNED: To keep things clearer for the reader, create sign posts in the structure for the audience, ex. unity of subject matter + capitalized locations.

Married to the Mob (1988)(7/14/87 draft)
by Barry Strugatz & Mark R. Burns

TODAY'S NUGGET: Rachel Getting Married (2008) - Example of How Biting Wit & Humor Both Connects and Isolates

[Quick Summary:  Kym, who has been in and out of rehab, is allowed out of her recovery home for her sister Rachel's wedding.]

Q: What makes this melodrama stand out?
A: The key is the protagonist, Kym, who has a biting wit and humor.

Q: What's so unusual?
A: I never know whether it's to connect (and bring the other person closer), or to isolate (and keep them at a distance).  Either way, it keeps things suspenseful.

For example, in the scene below:
- Just prior to this scene, Kym's dad and step-mom have just picked her up from rehab for the wedding weekend.
- In the car, they try to act normal, but the parents are worried. 
- Kym answers their questions with wit, but is defensive.
- Kym wants to belong, but she also likes to be provocative to stand out. 
- Kym has a conscience, but is also self-absorbed.  
- Thus, we enter the scene below uneasy how Kym feels about her sister Rachel.
- Notice Kym is a person of extremes. When she (or another) makes an honest mis-step, she's hard on herself (and others) in a witty way. It's hard to predict but also hard to deal with.

 INT. UPSTAIRS. DAY. CONTINUOUS --

 ...KYM (to Rachel): No, seriously, you're so tiny it's like you're Asian. Dad wants us to sleep in the same room so you'll be able to watch me while he's asleep and I won't sneak out of the house and blow dealers and shoot heroin.

RACHEL: Dad did not say "blow dealers."

KYM: I told him I'd just sleep in Ethan's room.

Beat. [This is an honest mistake and they just realized it.  Also, it makes us wonder. Who is Ethan? What happened? Something bad?]

RACHEL: You can always shoot up in the tree. [Rachel deflects with humor and sarcasm.]

Kym laughs. A little too loud. [Kym does realize the mis-step and tries to cover.]

EMMA: Kym, I'm not remotely surprised you're starting your drama already, however it's Rachel's wedding and this week it's about her.

KYM: Emma, you still have your tiny core of rage! What a relief. [Kym can't admit Emma is right, so uses humor/sarcasm as a defense mechanism.]

Kym flops on the bed and gazes adoringly at her sister for a moment. Rachel beams back. [I found it interesting that the sisters are used to sarcastic humor, so they don't take it personally.]

WHAT I'VE LEARNED: The biting wit and humor works well here because it comes from character, i.e., it's how Kym deals with life.

It also lends itself to great suspense because we never know if it'll connect, or isolate, her.

Rachel Getting Married (2008)(undated)
by Jenny Lumet

TODAY'S NUGGET: National Treasure (2004) - What Sets Apart the Escalation in This Blockbuster Action Film

[Quick Summary: A historian treasure hunter races against mercenaries who are also looking for the lost Templar treasure.]

In my hunt for more scripts written by E. Max Frye,* I was surprised to find this action blockbuster among his more intimate, character driven films.

However, what sets this film apart from a lot of action adventures is that the big set pieces still feel intimate, in part because they're driven by characters.** 

Consider the escalation scene below:
- Ben Gates, the protagonist, has convinced Ian, a financier, to fund him for the last 7 months. At heart, he's a historian.
- Riley is Ben's compatriot and researcher.
- Ian only wants the treasure to make himself famous.
- Ben, Riley, Ian have traveled to the Arctic to board a 200 y.o. sunken frigate.
- Inside, they found a pipe with a riddle, which they solved.
- The riddle points to the existence of a treasure map, but it's on the back of the Declaration of Independence. 
- Ben refuses to steal the Declaration of Independence. 
- Ian pulls out a gun and demands to know all Ben knows about the riddle.
- I liked this good vs. bad guy action scene because it shows creativity in the snowball effect. 
- When Ian threatens, Ben turns the tables with a lighter --> light goes out --> gunshots --> gas lamp hit & explodes --> Fire!
- Notice how the scene begins with character, i.e., a stand-off, and the escalating action is an extension of the tension between them. 

INT. SHIP, CAPTAIN'S CABIN - CONTINUOUS 

...Ian turns his gun on Riley instead.

IAN: Tell me, or I shoot Riley.

RILEY: Wait! How do you know I don't know something else about the riddle?!

Ben and Ian can't help but just give Riley a look, then Ian pulls the trigger...BLAM!

Riley flinches as the glass porthole in the wall just behind him shatters. The old ship GROANS.

RILEY (CONT'D): Shit. Come on, Ben. Tell him what he doesn't know.

BEN: Okay...

Ben comes up with HIS LIGHTER and flicks it on.

BEN (CONT'D): ...for one thing, the whole room below us is full of gunpowder.

Ben holds the flame over the trap door in the floor. 

BEN (CONT'D): You shoot anyone, I drop this, and none of us gets out of here alive.

Ian eyes the flame. Ben eyes the gun. A tense stand-off.

RILEY (incredulous): Whoa-whoa-whoa! How did we all go from wildly rich to dead in a matter of minutes? Let's think here.

Just then, the FLAME FLICKERS AND GOES OUT. Ian shrugs.

On reflex, Ben tackles Riley and hurls them both to the ground behind the desk as...

Ian OPENS fire on them...BLAM-BLAM-BLAM-BLAM-BLAM!

Bullets CHEW UP the desk and walls. 

One bullet takes out the GAS LANTERN. It explodes with an OIL FIRE, instantly setting the desk ablaze. 

WHAT I'VE LEARNED: Why is it important to start with character before escalating the action? Because the subsequent set piece/action/fights now have meaning. 

National Treasure (2004)(4/9/03 draft)
by Jim Kouf, Cormac & Marianne Wibberley
Previous drafts by Jim Kouf, E. Max Frye, Jon Turteltaub

*I'm attempting to read as many E. Max Frye scripts as possible (even ones he's rewritten, like this one). 

**I would argue that this is a trademark combination in the films produced by producer Jerry Bruckheimer.  

TODAY'S NUGGET: Fracture (2007) - When Anthony Hopkins is Thrilled that Ryan Gosling Can't Find the Right Gun (Motives & Tension)

[Quick Summary: A prosecutor is pitted against a diabolical suspect who freely admits to shooting his own wife, but the gun on the scene is the wrong one.]

I stumbled across this riveting read, which features Ryan Gosling (prosecutor Willy) vs. Anthony Hopkins (murder suspect Crawford) in a "locked room" murder. * **

I was impressed how the writers kept the tension rising through motives:
- Mr. Crawford's wife was having an anonymous affair with a LAPD detective.  
- Crawford arranges to kill his wife, while this detective is on duty. 
- Crawford admits he killed his wife, but the gun at the scene belongs to the detective! 
- Crawford likes to play games and HAS to win (motive).
- Prosecutor Willy, who is leaving for a cushy law firm job, could let this case slide.
- But Crawford has done his homework on Willy, who also HAS to win (motive).
- Willy still has no clue to where the gun is, even on when the trial begins. We can't stop watching! We need to know what happens! 

I really liked the scene below, as it is a turning point for Willy:
- Marchand is the senior Scene Investigation Division tech in charge of searching the house.
- Note how Willy's desire to win drives him NOT give up, even though the facts now favor Crawford.
- Because Willy cannot get to his goal, we're curious to see what he'll do next.
- I really like how motives drive the tension.

INT. CRAWFORD HOUSE - LIVING ROOM - DUSK

WILLY: What about the neighbors' property? He could have thrown it over the hedges. 

MARCHAND: We checked. (beat) He might have passed it off to somebody, Willy. Had an accomplice, waiting, out the back.

Willy shakes his head, grim. Pacing.

WILLING: This isn't an accomplice sort of guy.

He slows. Looking across the room at the big Rube Goldberg device. As he moves toward it:

WILLY: This is a ...guy who likes to show off.

He examines the intricate workings, eyes traveling the clutter of metal and wires and motors. 

Checks Marchand - who shakes his head.

WILLY: You sure?

MARCHAND: I'm sure.

Willy grimaces. Fuming, relentless: 

WILLY: It's a physical object. It can't just vanish. We're missing something - some step in the story.

He begins walking through the crime, "the stations of the cross" - re-enacting it, starting from the front door, methodical, reciting it to himself:

WILLY: The neighbor sees her get home. He's already inside. She lets herself in. A minute or two later: blood-pattern says she's standing over there - he's somewhere around here.

Willy stands where Crawford was. Raises a finger-gun.

WILLY: Boom. 

As Willy goes to where Jennifer fell:

MARCHAND: But then he carries her back there. Why? 

Willy walks along the path defined by the drops of blood:

WILLY: Because he's gonna need time. To confess. When he's alone with the cop. 

WHAT I'VE LEARNED: A character like Willy, who is this strongly motivated, will naturally conflict with others, which in turn, drives the tension.

Fracture (2007)(1/6/05, with revisions)
by Dan Pyne

*I've been attempting to read as many E. Max Frye scripts as possible, even ones he's rewritten, such as this one. 

**As a side note: This script is well written and reads really fast.  Scripts this good often have a lot of help, and I counted 6 writers listed on the cover page. 

TODAY'S NUGGET: Where the Money Is (2000) - Woman as Aggressor

[Quick Summary: After discovering her patient has faked his symptoms in order to be transferred from prison, a nurse provokes him into robbing banks again to escape her boring life.]

Writer E. Max Frye's writing has a distinctive voice* that lends itself to suspense.  

His characters who are willing to go to extremes to get what they want.  If they do not know what they want, they're willing to cause chaos to find out.

The latter is the case with his scripts from last week and this week.  The emotionally starved women are searching for thrills and become the aggressor to find it.

For example, in the scene below:
- The protagonist, Carol, is a nurse in a nursing home.
- She's never traveled or done much in life.
- She married Wayne out of high school. They have a steady, but predictable, relationship.
- The highlight of their lives was winning high school prom.
- Her newest patient, Henry, is a bank robber who was recently transferred from prison.
- Henry has fooled everyone by pretending he's suffered a stroke. 
- Carol is the only one who suspects that Henry is faking it.  
- Henry is mute for the first 23 pgs., until the scene below.
- Carol thinks Henry has what she wants (notoriety, really LIVED, known for something) and is the key to getting it for herself.
- Notice how far she's willing to push to get a reaction. Though dysfunctional, she's so blinded by desperation to feel some excitement, she doesn't care. 

EXT. RIVER - LATE AFTERNOON 

Carol clenches her jaw, gets up and kneels beside Henry.

CAROL: Mr. Manning I know you hear me. I know you see me. I'm not gonna hurt you. You can trust me. I want to be your friend.

She reaches out, touches his cheek. He's blank.

WAYNE: Carol...

She pulls out her lighter, holds the flame under his hand. Nothing.

WAYNE: Carol! What the hell you think you're doinl!

He jumps up, grabs the lighter from her.

WAYNE: We're supposed to be havin' a picnic not a freakin' barbecue!

He pockets the lighter. Carol looks at Henry. 

CAROL: All right, damn you.

She grabs the wheelchair, begins pushing it toward the boat ramp.

WAYNE: Carol, don't do nothin' stupid!

But it's too late. She breaks into a run, pushes the wheelchair faster until they reach the sloping pavement of the boat ramp.

WAYNE: Oh, my God!

She lets it go. It races toward the river: SPLASH! Henry quickly disappears beneath the surface.

WAYNE: You'll drown him! We got to get him out of there!

CAROL: No!

She grabs him as he races past. They struggle...then stop as Henry suddenly rises up out of the water like Poseidon. 

They watch him drag himself ashore. He wipes the water from his face, spits.

HENRY: Gimme a cigarette. 

WHAT I'VE LEARNED: It's the refusal (or not knowing how) to deal with their emotional starvation that results in the lashing out and dysfunction.**

Where the Money Is (2000)(1/8/96 revised)
by E. Max Frye  

*I thought his quote on IMDB was very insightful:

I was lucky. I was thirty by the time Something Wild (1986) came along, so I pretty much already had my voice. I avoided the pitfalls of the rewrite business, and I moved back as soon as I could to New York and continued to write spec scripts. But I've taught film at NYU enough that I see promising screenwriters take the three-picture deal with Disney, and they just disappear after two years of intense grinding and studio manipulation, notes, and people kicking the shit out of them. Before they know what's going on, they have no voice left - if they ever had one to begin with. Or their nascent kind of voice that attracted the studios and producers in the first place gets stomped right out of them.

**Lest you think this type of character may seem unrealistic and too theatrical, I recently experienced the blowback of dealing with one in real life and the "I want what I want" stonewalling was very real.

TODAY'S NUGGET: Something Wild (1996) - To Unleash Messy Inner Desires, Pinpoint the Deep Want/Desire (Character)

[Quick Summary: A rule breaking free spirit seduces a straight laced VP to leave his responsibilities behind, but her ex-convict husband tracks them down.]

One of the hallmarks of a well-crafted script is when it's emotionally (but not structurally) messy.  

Writer E. Max Frye seems to have a knack for this by ensuring the characters are well rounded.  He carefully selects what the characters want so that they conflict.*

In today's script, for example:
- Lulu is well meaning, but also selfish.  She's driven by desire, fun with no strings.  
- Charles is super-responsible, but emotionally starved.  He desperately wants the adventure that Lulu represents. 
- I wondered, "Why doesn't Charles simply walk away?" It's because he's dry timber and she's a flame.  She provokes his deep desire, bypassing his normal caution. 
- Note that the emotions are messy, but not the structure of the scene.

EXT. MOTEL 

...LULU (interrupting): You have money?

He looks at her questioningly

LULU (CONT.): I mean for the room. The rest is free.

He pulls will wallet out.

CHARLES: I can't use the credit cards 'cause they're all company plastic. Our accountant would sure wonder what I was doing in a cheap motel in the middle of Jersey on a Friday afternoon.

LULU: Use the cash.

CHARLES: I can't use it.

LULU: Why not?

He hesitates and looks at her sheepishly. 

CHARLES: It's money for the Christmas Club.

LULU: What's a Christmas Club?

CHARLES: You put money every week into the Christmas Club. It's at my bank. That way when Christmas comes you're not low on cash. I do it every year. This is money for the Christmas Club. I can't spend it.

She looks at him incredulously.

LULU: Charlie, are you telling me we're not going to get a room 'cause you're saving money for Christmas presents...In the middle of June?

He looks at the money then at her. He sees her legs, on her hips and the pouting red mouth. He sees her breasts pushing out of her shirt toward him. He sees a young woman waiting for him to get a motel room so they can go to bed.

CHARLES: Oh, to hell with Christmas. 

WHAT I'VE LEARNED: I really appreciated the clarity of these character's desires.  They're messy and conflict, i.e., interesting, but I was also never lost.

Something Wild (1996)(10/31/25, 2nd draft)
by E. Max Frye

*FYI: I will be exploring more of his work in these next four scripts. 

TODAY'S NUGGET: Sunset (1988) - Regaining One's Dignity in a Parting Shot (Blake Edwards' Style + Setup-Payoff)

[Quick Summary: After lawman Wyatt Earp agrees to consult on a film starring Tom Mix, they trace a murder by the sadistic studio head that leads to a battle at the first Academy Awards.]

I really enjoy Blake Edwards' ability to construct a parting shot that's deeper than just a funny line of dialogue.  They're witty, with a character flourish.

For example, in the scene below:
- Actor Tom Mix is going to play lawman Wyatt Earp in a film.  
- The sadistic studio chief has decided to hire the real Wyatt Earp to act as a consultant. 
- The studio chief has sent his studio police man, Dibner, to track down Tom Mix (star) and Wyatt Earp (hired consultant).  
- Dibner hired two stunt men to rough up Tom and Wyatt at this restaurant. 
- Tom has just threatened Dibner and slammed him up a wall.
- Wyatt now steps up. 
- Note how the construction of this scene sets up the parting shot: Tom has physically threatened Dibner --> Wyatt threatens too --> Tom (and the audience) know Wyatt's threat has more force --> Tom tries to regain his dignity by "setting Wyatt straight" --> Tom's parting shot makes fun of the credibility he lacks compared to Wyatt

INT. EL COYOTE - NIGHT

...WYATT: I don't know what he told you, Marvin, but seein' as how I'm more civilized than he is I'd like to put in my two cents worth. From here on, you give me any more trouble and I'm gonna kill you. Understand?

DIBNER: Yes.

WYATT: Say it. Convince me.

DIBNER: Any more trouble...you'll kill me.

WYATT: I believe you. So from now on, whether you live or die, it's up to you.

DIBNER (shakes his head): 'Scuse me.

He hurries into the men's room.  Wyatt turns to go but Tom stops him.

TOM: Just a minute. We better get somethin' straight right now!

WYATT: What's wrong?

TOM: I threatened I was gonna drag him behind my horse then you waltz in pretty as you please an' threaten to kill him. I don't like bein' out-threatened.

WYATT: I'm sorry. 'Won't ever happen again.

TOM: Okay...

They walk away.

TOM (continuing): Bad as bein' upstaged. 'Got to remember I'm a star.

WHAT I'VE LEARNED: This parting shot works because: 
a) it has deeper meaning about character, i.e., Tom's attitude about himself; and 
b) it was constructed (setup) from the scene so that it becomes a satisfying payoff.

Don't be fooled into simply tacking on an amusing line. If it doesn't have deeper meaning, it does not resonate, and thus, is not as funny. 

Sunset (1988)(3/20/87 with revisions)
by Blake Edwards
Based on a novel by Rod Amateau