[Quick Summary: When a good cop goes undercover to try to ferret out a drug importer, will he succumb to the excesses and violence?]
Q: Screenwriting rules should never, ever, ever be broken, right?
A: I felt that way too...until I saw every one of them broken.* Stick with the "rules" until you know when, how, and most importantly WHY, to break them.
Q: *Gasp!* But WHEN? HOW? Don't tell me "I'll only know with experience."
A: I only figured it out by experience (reading and writing, reading and writing).**
Q: Can you give me an example of when to break "show, not tell"?
A: Today's action thriller script is a good example when telling what's inside a character's head works best.
Critic Roger Ebert explains the protagonist's dilemma:
What sets "Deep Cover" apart is its sense of good and evil, the way it has the Fishburne character agonize over the moral decisions he has to make. Most drug movies are so casual about their shootings and killings that you'd hardly think it even hurt to get shot. ...Among the many unexpected aspects of this movie is the way its characters constantly ask themselves what the right course is - and if they can afford to take it.
This is apparent in the scene below:
- The protagonist, Hull, is a good cop with strong morals.
- He swore he'd never do drugs, like his dad who died robbing a liquor store.
- However, he's put into deep undercover to ferret out a drug dealer.
- He has witnessed a lot of horrible things, but hasn't crossed the line yet.
- He hooks up with a minor drug dealer, Elias, who doesn't know Hull is a cop.
- Elias gives Hull credibility and introduces him to buyers and sellers.
- Betty owns a jewelry store that is a laundering front.
- This is the first time Betty meets Hull.
- The Note explains concisely what is going on inside of Betty. Yes, this is "telling" rather than showing, but there's a very quick, complicated, non-verbal dynamic going on. I wouldn't be surprised if the writer resorted to this description as the most efficient explanation.
- Even though this is "telling," note how concise the description is.
INT. JEWELRY STORE - DAY
... She produces a vial of coke, looks questioningly at Elias.
ELIAS: By all means.
She draws out six lines. Elias does two.
BETTY (offering him the straw): Come on, Eddie 2, you're up.
HULL: No, thanks.
(NOTE: Betty is acutely attuned to Hull, and in his refusal she senses - albeit unconsciously -- two things: first, that he doesn't trust himself on drugs, therefore, he's a dangerous guy and, therefore, exciting; and, second, more important, the refusal bespeaks a repudiation of the violence and danger and, thus, a longing for goodness. Despite the seeming contradiction, she finds this even more attractive. But because she feels herself to be bad, his goodness seems only a judgment against her, and so she thinks she hates him.)
BETTY: Who is he, my mother?
HULL (smiles): Never have, never will.
Betty ignores him, does her lines.
BETTY (taunting Hull): Oooh...Cocaine, I love it and I hate it and I love it. The disease is the cure.
WHAT I'VE LEARNED: If there's no other way but to "tell" rather than show, then do it. Don't let the "rules" hamper your expression.
Deep Cover (1992)(7/16/91 draft)
by Michael Tolkin and Henry Bean
*As a new writer, I was too quick to point out screenwriting "violations
of the rules." The reality is that:
- There are no rules.
- Sometimes ignoring the rules accomplishes what following the rules could not.
- A preoccupation with "rules" avoids dealing with the fact that the writing may lack maturity and craft.
- The most important measure is "does it work?", not "does it follow the rules?"
**Other hints on breaking screenwriting "rules":
- The purpose of the "rules" are to give new writers general guidelines to hold on to. (ex. Cinema is visual medium, so it's important to externalize emotions, hence, "show not tell.")
- As I grew as a writer, I realized I was hanging on to the "rules" too much, and they restricted my freedom to imagine and take big swings.
- If I broke a "rule," I found it helpful to explain to myself WHY, and then make sure I wrote it down in my notes. I didn't need to explain it to the reader, but I did need to make sure I knew why, even if it was "I don't know how else to say this."
- The goal is a page turner for the reader. The "rules" don't guarantee this.
- When a writer breaks
the "rules," I've noticed that it tends to be in certain areas, like the example above,
and not the whole script.
- Any "rule-breaking" does not excuse sloppy writing. Yes, the example above is breaking the "show, don't tell rule," but more importantly, it is also concise and written well to express a difficult emotional dynamic.
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