I once heard someone ask a famous screenwriter, "What separates a good writer from a great one?"
"Transitions," he said. It's always stuck with me.
As I read this script, I noticed that the transitions were not just a location change.
ex. "ANGLE
In a long shot, the armed strikebreakers thrashing their way into the line of the strikers.
ANGLE
A young woman screaming.
ANGLE
INT. THE R.E.A. BUILDING. The businessmen we saw in the previous sequence, pressed forward in the window of a paneled board room, looking down. [This smooth move from the freightyard to the boardroom is a reaction shot.]
ANGLE
Their POV, the slaughter in the freightyard below.
ANGLE
In the freightyard. Ciaro, clubbing a man to the ground. Looks around. [We move back to the freightyard to see the action.]
ANGLE HIS POV
Hoffa. Being set upon by two strikebreakers....
ANGLE
INT. THE BOARDROOM. A man's hand closes the curtains on the fight below. [Back to the boardroom for another reaction shot.]
INT. UNION HALL. NIGHT.
A line of long drawn faces. Men and women dressed in their "best'. Nodding at the camera, moving on. There is a break in the line, to reveal, behind them, a huge floral [funeral] wreath...." [This scene is the consequences of the fighting.]
WHAT I'VE LEARNED: You can use transitions to drive an emotional point home.
In the example above:
- Action in freightyard --> Boardroom's REACTION is to panic
- Action in freightyard --> The funeral is the CONSEQUENCES
[By the way, this is something the reader is not even conscious of (but the writer should be!)]
Hoffa (1992)
by David Mamet
WHAT I'VE LEARNED: You can use transitions to drive an emotional point home.
In the example above:
- Action in freightyard --> Boardroom's REACTION is to panic
- Action in freightyard --> The funeral is the CONSEQUENCES
[By the way, this is something the reader is not even conscious of (but the writer should be!)]
Hoffa (1992)
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