TODAY'S NUGGET: The Jewel of the Nile (1985) - Perfectly Timed Dialogue and Action (Stakes, Hope-Fear in Romance)

[Quick Summary: A sequel to Romancing the Stone. After an ambitious African politician kidnaps writer Joan Wilder to write his life's story, the selfish Jack Coulter races to her rescue.] 

I agreed with critic Roger Ebert that this story was good, but it lacked romance:

But the original contract specified a sequel, and it’s to everybody’s credit that “The Jewel of the Nile” is an ambitious and elaborate attempt to repeat the success of the first movie; it’s not just a ripoff. Even so, it lacks some of the pleasures of “Romancing,” especially the development of the romance between Douglas and Turner.

He went on to praise the mechanism of his favorite scene in a rat pit*  

I couldn't find that scene in this draft, but found a similar one in which the emotional and physical beats fall like clockwork (below):
- Joan, Jack, and the Jewel have arrived at a village.
- The Chief will let them pass if they pay the $1M toll.
- Pay attention to the rhythm of the scene.
- Notice the hope-fear-hope-fear pattern winds up the tension.

EXT. NUBIAN VILLAGE

...The CHIEF talks aside with the Jewel.

JEWEL: You don't have to pay it. ... Instead he will take Joan for one hour. [Fear. Emotional stakes are high here.]

Jack stops dancing. Looks at Joan.

JOAN: He's kidding. [Hope. She tries to dispel the fear.]

JEWEL: Just one hour. [Fear.]

JACK (teasing): Well Joan, now you can do something serious. Something that really matters. (to the Chief) Go ahead. 

The NUBIANS laugh as Jack offers the CHIEF Joan's hand. All one big joke. Until the CHIEF starts pulling her into his hut.

JACK: OK...fun's fun...hey, that's it. [Fear.]

Now Jack grabs the CHIEF. Wrong move. He's immediately seized by six young toughs. Joan becomes scared. The Chief talks roughly.

JEWEL (translating): He wants to know if you are married? [Emotional stakes.]

JOAN: No.

JEWEL (translating): Any babies? [Higher emotional stakes.]

JACK: No. ...look, what's the difference?

The CHIEF now pushes Jack in the chest. [Physical move that raises stakes.]

JEWEL: Then decide. Either he takes Joan for an hour...

JACK: Or...?

JEWEL: You will lose your leg.  [Fear.]

A terribly OBESE NUBIAN steps forward with a broad AXE on a long handle. The other young toughs stretch out one of Jack's legs. Tension is unbearable. They realize the CHIEF is serious.

JOAN: Jack...I ...I have to. [Rising emotional stakes.]

JACK (straining against their holds): NO!! I forbid you.

JOAN: You can't.

JACK (screams for all he's worth):  NOOOO!!! [Highest tension, stakes.]

The CHIEF looks at Joan.  A wave of his hand and the OBESE NUBIAN raises his axe. Joan turns to the CHIEF. Touches her chest.

JOAN: Yes. Now. 

JACK (half-crazed) Cut the leg. (at the Chief) DAMN IT! CUT OFF MY GODDAMNED LEG!! [FEAR! PEAK OF FEAR!]

JEWEL: That is your decisions?

JACK (really scared): Yes...

JOAN: Jack...

ON THE AXE

High in the air. A beat, then down it comes. BAM! Into the dirt next to Jack. A great CHEER goes up among the Nubians. They start to dance in simple, sweet ecstacy.

JACK - BEING BEAR-HUGGED BY THE CHIEF

ready to faint, looks to Joan, then to the Jewel.

JEWEL (translating): We are free to go no.   ... The Nubians are hopeless romantics. Some tribes enjoy tests of strength. ...They like to test love. [Funny release of tension.]

JACK AND JOAN 

are hoisted on shoulders and carried around the village.

WHAT I'VE LEARNED: One key to escalating stakes is the pendulum of emotions swinging from hope to fear.  Don't be afraid to swing widely.

The Jewel of the Nile (1985)(1st draft)
by Mark Rosenthal & Lawrence Konner

* Ebert wrote: 

...My favorite moment between them comes as they hang by their hands over a rat pit, while acid gnaws away at the ropes that suspend them above certain doom. Sure, this scene owes something to “Raiders of the Lost Ark.” But what’s new about it this time is the dialogue – the way they break down and confess that they love each other, and make marriage plans as death inexorably approaches. And then, when DeVito appears and might possibly save them, there is some business with a ladder that is followed by dialogue so perfectly timed that I laughed not so much in amusement as in delight at how well the mechanisms of the scene fell together. (my underline)

TODAY'S NUGGET: Superman 2 (1980) - The Art of Combining a Pratfall, Story, & Romance

[Quick Summary: Superman begins a relationship with Lois Lane, only to be interrupted three Kryptonian criminals arrives to hunt him on Earth.]

I thought this was a great sequel script because it has enough new story AND still has the same themes of Superman I.*

I particularly liked the scene below because it combines several things:
- Story - Lois steps out a window to make Clark prove he's NOT Superman.
- Romance & conflict - Clark wants to rescue Lois, but also protect his identity.
- Pratfall - I'm a sucker for any type of action that add humor and movement.
- Theme - Notice how it is built along the lines of "a love story + man can fly."

EXT. SIDE OF PLANET BUILDING - DAY

LOIS falls through the air.

INT. PLANET STAIRWELL - DAY

A revolving blur shoots down the stairwell.

EXT. STREET - PLANET ENTRANCE - DAY

SUPERMAN is almost instantly at the street entrance to the Daily Planet, looks up.

BACK TO LOIS

LOIS hasn't far to go.

BACK TO SUPERMAN

SUPERMAN inhales, blows up at her with his super-breath.

BACK TO LOIS

The gust of wind hits LOIS, breaking her fall, wafting her slightly upward like a leaf.

ANGLE ON PASTRY SHOP - SUPERMAN'S POV

TWO DELIVERY MEN emerge from the pastry shop, under a closed awning, carrying an enormous wedding cake toward a waiting delivery van.

BACK TO SUPERMAN

SUPERMAN smiles, turns on his X-Ray vision.

ANGLE ON STREET - SUPERMAN'S POV

The heat vision hits the closed metal awning apparatus, popping it open. The awning unfurls over the DELIVERY MEN and wedding cake as LOIS hits the awning, bounces, rolls off the edge, missing the cake by a hair, falling heavily into the fruit pushcart. The PUSHCART MAN screams as fresh fruit, especially bananas, goes flying.

ANGLE ON SIDEWALK

Ripe bananas hit the pavement near the feet of the DELIVERY MEN, burst open.

CLOSE ON LOIS

LOIS, totally smeared and smothered in squishy fruit, looks up in shock.

WHAT I'VE LEARNED: I liked that this scene had real story, real stakes, and was not about another set piece that would look great but ring hollow.

Superman 2 (1980)(Mar. 1977, shooting script, revised)
Story by Mario Puzo
Script by Mario Puzo and David Newman and Leslie Newman & Robert Benton (& Tom Mankiewicz (uncredited))

* As mentioned in my previous post, the director's instructions to the writer were: “The most important thing when you look at it is this: make a love story. And prove a man can fly.”

TODAY'S NUGGET: Beverly Hills Cop II (1987) - What I Look For in a Sequel

[Quick Summary: After his friend Capt. Bogomil, is shot while following up on a hot tip, Axel Foley hightails it to LA to track down the culprits.]

When a sequel comes along, I want to know:

1) Did they understand what made the first movie work?
2) Did they deliver that again here?

In this sequel:

1) Foley was funny in first film, especially with LA cops Rosewood and Taggart. They overcame big obstacles together as a team.
2) Not really. Foley is not that funny and does not seem to have difficulty overcoming obstacles.  The script seems more interested in explosions, car chases.

The one thing that worked was the team dynamic of how Foley is always dragging Rosewood and Taggart into his schemes.

I liked the scene below because it is funny and reminiscent of the first film.

We know very well that Foley is up to something crazy but Rosewood and Taggart are willing, if reluctant, accomplices.

ex. "EXT. ROSENBERG MANSION - DAY

Taggart and Rosewood stand staring up at the gates.

TAGGART: This has GOT to be a mistake.

ROSEWOOD: There's his car.

Way up the driveway. There it is.

TAGGART (very nervous): Billie, if he's here, he must be robbing the place.

He pulls his gun. They walk cautiously up the long driveway. CAMERA HINGES to see:

WILLIE AND MAY'S CAR parked down the street a couple blocks."

WHAT I'VE LEARNED: The writers tried, really tried, but sometimes you can't recapture funny in a bottle.

Beverly Hills Cop II (1987)(shooting script, 10/24/86 w/revisions)
by Larry Ferguson and Warren Skaaren

TODAY'S NUGGET: Analyze That (2002) - Sequels; Conflict

[Quick Summary: After a failed assassination attempt, a mobster escapes from jail to find his assassins.]

I know I have unrealistic expectations for sequels.

So I wasn't surprised that I liked Analyze This much better than Analyze That.

It boils down to this:

In the first film, the mobster Vitti was terribly conflicted inside. He lost all confidence and couldn't function at work or at home.

He desperately needed the shrink to work through the conflict.

In the sequel, Vitti wasn't conflicted.  He needed the shrink once, i.e., to break out of jail.

In the first film, I rooted for Vitti. I needed to know how it would end.

In the sequel, I had little reason to root or care.

WHAT I'VE LEARNED: Conflict = Keeps the reader caring.

Analyze That (2002)
by Peter Steinfeld, Harold Ramis, & Peter Tolan

TODAY'S NUGGET: Odd Couple 2 (1998) - D.O.A. of a Good Sequel

[Quick Summary: Thirty years later, Felix and Oscar reunite for a road trip to their children's wedding.]

Neil Simon had a huge hit with The Odd Couple play in 1965.

But then came:

- A huge movie (1968)
- A popular tv series (1970-75)
- A cartoon (1975)
- A sitcom (1982-83)
- A reunion tv movie (1993)

If you were Simon in 1998, would you write a sequel 30 years after the original?

I am glad he did because this is a good sequel script.

It keeps enough of what made the original special, and continues to develop the characters with new challenges

Unfortunately, the timing sucked.

Generations grew up with other Odd Couples.  Matthau/Lemon had moved on to the similar Grumpy Old Men (1993).

Neil Simon said it best:

"If this were 1967 instead of 1999, The Odd Couple [2] would have made a perfect sequel on the heels of the first one....[It] would have had the same energy as the first one." *

WHAT I'VE LEARNED: Sometimes a good sequel can be dead on arrival.

* Preface of The Odd Couple 1 &2.


The Odd Couple 2 (1998)
by Neil Simon