[Quick Summary: After former Inspector Dreyfus leaves an insane asylum, he sends assassins after Inspector Clouseau.]
Blake Edwards wrote and directed the original Inspector Clouseau/Pink Panther films.* Today's script is #4 of his 8 films.**
These scripts are a joy to read because:
a) the joke is always on Clouseau, who is clueless;
b) the slapstick is constantly moving him out of the fire into the frying pan;
c) the slapstick is inventive.
Here are three examples:
EXAMPLE 1: ROMANTIC JOKE ON CLOUSEAU - A Beautiful Mysterious Woman thinks she's slept with Clouseau, when it was actually another spy, James.
INT. MUNICH HOTEL FIFTH FLOOR HALLWAY - NIGHT
The elevator doors open and Clouseau exits, walks to his door, is about to put the key in the lock when he realizes that the Clerk has given him the bedroom key. He walks back, unlocks the bedroom door and enters as James [the English spy] exits from the sitting room.
INT. CLOUSEAU'S SUITE - BEDROOM - NIGHT
Dark. The lights in the sitting room have been turned off. Clouseau makes his way to the light switch. CLICK. No lights in here. He makes his way into the sitting room, bumps into a table. We HEAR the Beautiful Mysterious Woman SIGH. Clouseau turns the lights on in the sitting room.The Beautiful Mysterious Woman awakens, gets up and goes into the bathroom. Clouseau comes back into the bedroom, gets undressed and puts on his pyjamas, goes back into the sitting room. The Beautiful Mysterious Woman comes out of the bathroom and climbs back into bed. Clouseau turns off the sitting room light, bumps into the table again and returns to the bedroom. He climbs in bed. A long silence, then Clouseau lets out a yell, leaps from the bed and runs into the sitting room, hits the table, turns on the lights and carefully makes his way back to the bedroom where he freezes at the sigh t of the Beautiful Mysterious Woman in his bed.
B.M.W. (smiling wickedly): Forgive me, darling. I just washed my hands and they must have been freezing.
CLOUSEAU: Yes. Freezing. Hands.
It dawns on him that he must be in the wrong apartment. He hurries across the room, opens the door, checks the room number, and returns, checks his key.
EXAMPLE 2: "OUT OF THE PAN, INTO THE FIRE" SCHTICK - One mistake leads to another.
INT. MUNICH HOTEL LOBBY - NIGHT
A CLEANING MAN. vacuuming. A SERVICE REPAIR MAN standing on a stepladder, putting new light bulbs into the huge crystal chandelier. Clouseau trips on the vacuum cleaner cord, stumbles into the ladder, knocking it out from under the Service Repair Man who grabs the chandelier. While the Service Repair Man swings from the chandelier and the Cleaning Man unplugs the broken vacuum that is spewing a geyser of dirt, some of the hotel staff rush to give aid, take the ladder form Clouseau who then continues his way to the desk as if nothing has happened.
EXAMPLE 3: INVENTIVE "TOILET" HUMOR
INT. PUBLIC TOILET - NIGHT
Clouseau enters, waits. The Mexican Assassin enters. A man exits a stall and Clouseau goes in as the East German enters. A man exits a stall on the other side of Clouseau and the East German takes it. We are WATCHING three pairs of legs. Clouseau's shoe lace is untied. He bends to tie it. The TWO "WHUMPS" SOUND almost like one. The life goes out of the two pairs of legs on either side of Clouseau. The Assassin's silenced gun clatters to the tile floor. Clouseau stands, FLUSHES TOILET and emerges, exits short.
WHAT I'VE LEARNED: I really am impressed by the inventive ways the writers get Clouseau out of worse and worse situations. It's like kids playing on the page.
The Pink Panther Strikes Again (1976)(11/19/75 revised)
by Frank Waldman and Blake Edwards
*FYI: The first Inspector Clouseau film featured a diamond called the "Pink Panther." It was so popular that subsequent Inspector Clouseau films were dubbed "Pink Panther" films even though they didn't feature the diamond again.
**I imagine Edwards was not super-thrilled that studios wanted many sequels.
However, I also imagine the studios were eager to get Edwards back because:
1) the public was still interested in Clouseau even a decade later; and
2) two Clouseau projects without Edwards weren't as well received.
Here's the list of Pink Panther/Blake Edwards films. I included the two non-Edwards projects in bold, just for reference:
- The Pink Panther (1963) - David Niven
- A Shot in the Dark (1964) - Peter Sellers
- Inspector Clouseau (1968) - Alan Arkin
- "The Pink Panther" animated tv series (1969)
- The Return of the Pink Panther (1975) - Peter Sellers
- The Pink Panther Strikes Again (1976) - Peter Sellers
- Revenge of the Pink Panther (1978) - Peter Sellers
- Trail of the Pink Panther (1982) - Peter Sellers
- Curse of the Pink Panther (1983) - Peter Sellers
- Son of the Pink Panther (1993) - Roberto Benigni
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